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Posts Tagged ‘Being Alone’


I have not posted regularly  lately and ask for your understanding.  I’ve been on a carousel ride for the  past 10 months or so, and the ride is finally slowing down enough to allow me to jump off for awhile.

LONE LEAF

I had arranged a trip to the States months ago, to visit my family, and the timing could not be more perfect.  I am leaving for 3 weeks, and have no idea if I will be posting here, or not.

SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED TO BE ALONE

I even two blogger awards which I have not even gotten around to and extend my thanks to Heart Whispers
for nominating me for the wonderful 7×7 Award and to  TheBurntMap for the Kreativ Blogger nomination.  I am truly overwhelmed by these nominations and do promise to properly accept them as soon as I get back “on track”.

I am not disappearing forever, but the need to “be away” from all the current demands of my reality is very powerful, and will respect my soul’s wishes to stop the world and get off for awhile.  I’ve learned that truly listening to these inner messages, these soul needs, is essential to my good health on all levels.  When we move away from this “listening”, we find ourselves floundering in cold, choppy waters, looking for a log to grab onto to bring us back to shore.

I have found my log and am now hanging on for dear life.

I will treat myself with compassion, love and respect.

STREET FLOWERS TO BLESS AND CALM MY DAY

I am allowing myself to enjoy this period of rest and relaxation (or recuperation) to the fullest, without feeling guilty about it in any way, and with full compassion for my soul’s needs.

Will see you all when I find the need to be back here.

with love light and JOY

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Lessons learned the hard way, may be the best lessons we have, but life would be simpler if we didn’t need them to figure things out.

Sometimes, you need to be alone. Not to be lonely, but to enjoy the free time just being yourself.

 

Y. asked me awhile ago why I couldn’t bring whatever it is I have in India back home with me.  No matter how hard I tried, something was always missing.  I made a great effort at keeping the same relaxing pace in my life, and that usually worked, taking things easily, not letting things “get to me”, and of taking my daily walks, doing my morning practice, etc., but it was far from bringing India back with me.  It took awhile to understand what was still missing, but I eventually understood what the difference was of being alone in India vs. being here with my family, friends, partner, etc.

The true luxury of being able to think only of what I want to do each morning as I wake up – not what I need to do or should do – and if I decide to change my plans suddenly during the day, I don’t have to consult anyone other than myself.  This is not to say I sit around all day doing nothing there – far from it.  I have a busier social life than I do here, I work more than I do here, and am out and about much more than I am here (and if you are interested in seeing what I do there-you can check out my India Journal:   http://janesindiajournals.wordpress.com   ) While in India, I DO work, and DO have friend, DO have a full life, but it is always pretty much on my own terms, and according to my own wants and desires-not according to must, should or have to.  I have a very active and productive life there, but always on my own terms following the dictates of my soul – my inner voice-my own truth knowing what is exactly right for me at each moment.

Not being in India for a few months this year to regain my balance has taken its toll in many ways.  But it wasn’t until I was “hit” with pneumonia (following many minor illnesses, knee problems which kept me from my dancing and my yoga-(2 of my greatest joys) – eating problems resulting in severe weight loss, and more) that i finally realized what was happening.

I have just spent the past week or so, and still have a few days to go yet before I am completely well enough to go back to my “regular” routine-just spent this time joyfully and gratefully doing only what I want to do  – no  “need to do“, no “should do“, no “have to do“.  there will be plenty of time for all that soon enough.

But this short respite has been a true blessing for me and I’ve enjoyed every moment (am still enjoying) – (once of course I lovingly gave myself permission to be ill) without having to find “reasons” or “excuses” for saying “NO”, or not doing all the things I “should be”.  God sent me the excuse in the form of an illness which no one could argue with – You have pneumonia-you simply rest and take care of yourself-period.

It’s been a wonderful period of time-short-but lovely. And  although it is still not India, it was the “break” I needed to begin working my way slowly back to balance on all levels.

I’ve receive many lovely messages about things to come – on all levels of my personal life journey as well as my dealings with my friends, relatives, partner and clients.

It’s been a profound lesson.  If I simply could have declared a two-week “just for me vacation” a couple of months ago, as my soul was screaming out to me at the time, I wouldn’t have had to go through the difficulties I have been having health wise.

But how many people can just say

“Stop the world –I want to get off”,

and actually do it without having something come along to force them to?  Could You? Do You?

with love light and JOY

Jane

 

 

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