Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Self Love and Respect’ Category


….Including Myself!

love yourself

This was posted years ago in my blog “Jane’s Mindfulness Journal” but I was guided to share it today. Based on one of the important Reiki principles ” just for today I will love and respect every living creature” ,I have added the phrase “INCLUDING MYSELF” . I believe it is worth the time it takes to read. . This was published as an article in the highly prestigious Reiki International Magazine as well.

Just for Today I Will Love and Respect Every Living Creature

thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyselfleviticus 19:18

If we look at this, as it is worded in the fourth of theReiki Principles, it appears to be fairly straightforward. It is pretty obvious to us that one of the most important things in this world is to love and respect others, show compassion and tolerance, patience and understanding etc. We also know that we must be kind to EVERY living being and this would of course include animals, insects, plants etc., etc.The original wording of theprinciple as stated by Dr.Usui is slightly different, but the message is more easily understood with the above paraphrase which I prefer using in myReiki classes and in my own daily meditation practice.And the profoundness of the principle, if we truly think about it, opens the door to an entirely new way of perceiving the ups and downs of our lives, of relating to instances where we feel we have been wronged by someone, or taken advantage of, even purposely hurt or embarrassed, or injured in any way. Of relating to the different people who come into our lives and the way we accept and embrace all that is sent our way by God and the Universe.

In addition, if we add just two small words to the above principle, it changes the impact and intent even more deeply. Just for Today I will Love and Respect Every Living Creature…INCLUDING MYSELF!! If we do not truly love ourselves, how can we possibly love and respect our neighbor??

I will try and give insights into the following two questions we must try to answer:

1. Can we truly love and respect others if we don’t do the same for ourselves
2. Can we truly be expected to love and respect EVERYone??

Before going any further into the idea of loving even those who we perceive as causing us pain or wishing us ill, let us, just for a moment, think about our relationship with ourselves.

Do you love yourself? Are you proud of yourself? Do you respect yourself? Do you take yourself for granted? Do you put yourself down? Do you say unkind things about yourself ? Just for the next week, in addition to saying this principle each day with your daily prayers, meditation or whatever your regular practice is, try delving a little deeper into it. Pay attention during the day to the thoughts that you have regarding the things you do. Check the impulse to criticize yourself, or be compassionate with yourself. Note how you feel when you make a wrong decision, or get lost on the highway, or break a dish you are washing, or burn the supper, or simply forget to do something important. What feelings do you have, what words fill your head at the moment (stupid, clumsy, thoughtless, lazy). What sensations do you feel physically in your body? Where? Are you automatically hard on yourself, or, perhaps, compassionate and understanding.

Think about this for a week, and I think you will be quite surprised at what you find. Many of us cannot even say out loud “I love myself”, “I think I am great”, “I am perfect just as I am”, etc., but even those of us who CAN say these things and truly mean them, are still too often overly critical of ourselves.I would even think to perhaps state the principle in a little different way. Instead of “Just for today I will love and respect every living creature…(including myself)”…How about: “Just for today I will love and respect myself in the same way I imagine I love and respect every other living creature” . Said in that way, it might make it easier for us to realize how much more compassionate we can be with others, how much more tolerant and understanding, how much more patient and loving, than we tend to be with ourselves. 

Like a caring mother
Holding and guarding the life
Of her only child,
So with a boundless heart
Hold yourself…. And all beings
…Buddha

“We might quite readily offer such care to others, but we can learn to offer this same kind of gentle attention to ourselves. With the tenderness we might bring to stroking the cheek of a sleeping child, we can softly place a hand on our own cheek or heart. We can comfort ourselves with words of kindness and understanding. “ Radical Acceptance”, Tara Brach, PhD.

For once again, if we do not GENUINELY love and respect ourselves, our pretense at loving and respecting every living creature is just that…pretense… Self love is the first step in truly loving our fellow creatures. And when we love and respect ourselves, everything and anything that happens to us, can be dealt with in a healthy way.Only when we come to terms with our own shortcomings and learn to accept ourselves exactly as we are, to extend unconditional love to the beautiful person we are, to be compassionate with ourselves even when we are not all we expected of ourselves, to love and respect ourselves and recognize the beauty of our soul within…to feel worthy and deserving and freely offer praise and genuine respect to ourselves…only when we cherish our own being, no matter where we may find ourselves at a particular moment, or stage in our lives, only when we offer ourselves encouragement and love at each step along the way and appreciate our accomplishments-no matter how small, only when we stop taking ourselves and our own needs and wants for granted and understand that we are just as worthy and deserving as everyone else…only when we truly love and respect ourselves can we begin to truly love the next person.
LoveMyselfGraphic

Many people will say “I don’t expect anything from the next person (my children, my spouse, my co-workers, etc.) that I don’t expect from myself.” Well, perhaps we are much too hard on ourselves! Others find it easy to extend loving-kindness, compassion, patience, tolerance, understanding, forgiveness and encouragement to others, while they dole out to themselves judgment, blame, anger, belittling words, harsh accusations, lack of forgiveness, etc.

But it is only when we can find the way to love ourselves unconditionally that we can truly understand the words:

…thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself…leviticus 19:18

The idea has obviously been around for a long time and is not a new concept developed by Dr. Usui… The Great Hebrew Sage Rabbi Akiva said “This is the most important point in the Torah…the rest is just commentary”.

The idea of loving the next person as we love ourselves becomes very easy as we simply extend the same gracious and loving attention to everyone that we do to ourselves.

And that will bring us to the second part of this discussion…loving and respecting EVERY living creature:

Let us look at this idea of loving and respecting EVERYone …. This would seem almost impossible when we think of some of the strange, difficult, inconsiderate, spiteful and even abusive people who we meet in our lifetime. But there is a profound lesson in extending understanding, forgiveness (see the post re: Forgiveness ) , compassion , patience and tolerance to those who truly wish us ill. It brings us once again in contact with the idea of FAITH…faith that God is sending these people into our lives for a loving purpose…no matter how difficult that may be for us to see.

We must learn to Cherish those we dislike, even those we perceive as enemies, for they are gifts from God and we must be thankful for this blessing and pray for the wisdom to learn the lesson these people have been sent to teach us

We draw to us those who will help us learn about ourselves. Each time we are presented with a challenge dealing with another, we are really being presented with an opportunity to look inside ourselves to see what about us it is that needs working on, so that we may grow.

The idea of loving each and every person, no matter what, is quite difficult, almost impossible, but I present the idea to you for further thought and consideration, together with the following collection of quotes and insights, and perhaps your comments will lead to further discussion which will benefit us all:

Every person sent to us is a blessing meant to teach us a lesson we need to learn.
In the practice of tolerance, one’s enemy is the best teacher.
Dalai Lama
Everything that irritates us about others
Can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
Carl Jung (1875-1961), Psychologist ~I have learned silence from the talkative,
tolerance from the intolerant
and kindness from the unkind.
I should not be ungrateful to those teachers.
Kahlil Gibran
What angers us in another person is more often than not an unhealed aspect of ourselves. If we had already resolved that particular issue,we would not be irritated by its reflection back to us.~ Simon Peter Fuller (from ‘Rising Out of Chaos’) ~
No-one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) ~
Nothing can hurt you unless you give it the power to do so.
~ A Course in Miracles ~~
The main teachers of patience are our enemies.”
Dalai Lama

and with this I wish you all much love and compassion, patience and tolerance, and freedom from fear to accept and embrace all that is sent your way by God and His Loving Universe.

with love light and JOY
Jane

Read Full Post »


Cleansing and Mourning Process Gratefully Accepted

heal in your own time and your own way

I’ve been through a difficult frustrating week of what I now realize is a final cleansing and mourning process. Felt the flu coming on so attacked it full force with my ayurvedic herbal preparations. I felt no flu like symptoms per se except for weakness. So basically I didn’t really suffer much during the cleansing process but was frustrated in that I had to cancel all my plans for lots of dancing this week. Wednesday, Thursday and Friday! 😦 …but I am looking at it all compassionately and acceptingly and finally today I am beginning to feel better. But this could NOT happen until I hit rock bottom today, even cried, and eventually realized that if things had worked out differently, I would have been celebrating my ex’s birthday all throughout this weekend. Once I allowed myself to accept my feelings, to acknowledge and validate them, I began to feel better. No matter how sure we are that we have made the right decision, no matter how at peace we are with that decision, accepting the feelings that accompany it are all part of the cleansing and healing process. Give yourself permission to feel, to be sad, to cry, to mourn…and when your strength, energy and vitality return, you will know you are ready to healthily move on.

not getting what you want

I am missing him, and that is natural and normal, but not feeling bad about it…actually, not even sad but more acceptingly grateful that I was given the courage to be strong enough to end a relationship with someone who was not worth my loving him or worthy of my love. However difficult this is to do, the sense of relief I am feeling more than compensates for the loss I am feeling. I feel blessed to be in this place, at this moment, and know something so much better is finding its way to me. I am open and ready for it. I am truly blessed. I’ve learned valuable and important lessons from this past relationship and truly  experienced deep and powerful love for the first time. It was quite miraculous  and I am most grateful for being given this lovely and truly pleasurable learning experience. With all its difficulties, I would not have wanted to miss it for a moment.

i deserve better

I have lost something that I truly wanted in my life

But it was something that was not healthy for me and I am eternally grateful to you for giving me the strength to end it

weight and release

And now….smilingly waiting for whatever new and beautiful experience awaits me.

with much love light and JOY

Jane

Read Full Post »


The End of Crippling Shoes

roseI woke up this morning with a desperate need to write…something which hasn’t happened in an extremely long time and was sadly missing in my life. I almost crippled myself (and without realizing it, crippled my creativity as well) trying to wear the shoes I loved so dearly, but in the end the pain became too unbearable to withstand and I was forced to give up on them. Now that I am basically walking barefoot the process of healing is amazingly, and surprisingly, quick and complete. There definitely are times when loving something is not enough to continue fighting to keep it in your life.
For those of you who find the above confusing, you might want to read the post below which originally appeared on my blog in May 2013…only this time there are no open sandals either…I am now completely barefoot…and that seems to be the only way to get past shoes that don’t fit..no compromise, no in between state…toss them completely.
https://notinindia2012.wordpress.com/2013/05/30/when-the-shoe-doesnt-fit/

with much love light and JOY

Jane

Read Full Post »


Love yourself enough to allow yourself to be happy! You deserve it.

Be Happy You Deserve It

True happiness is a state of BEING.  It is something you ARE.  Something you choose to BE.

 If  you’ve been blessed with something or someone who gives you joy and pleasure; enjoy it.  Love yourself enough to allow yourself to enjoy it, without any further expectations beyond the feeling of happiness you have been blessed with.

Joy is something you can experience in every moment.  It is something you deserve. It is a choice you make. .

Be happy.  Love yourself enough to allow it. You deserve it.  Being happy is not the same as being funny.  It is not necessarily making people laugh at your jokes or your antics, although it may be. (Many people believe if they play the clown, it means they are happy people, but think of the picture of the sad clown…a clown is wearing a mask to hide something else deep inside…it is not his true being).

True happiness is a flowing energy which radiates out from the depth of your soul and can be felt by anyone who comes in contact with you, even if you don’t say a word.  It can be felt in your smile, in the sparkle in your eyes.  It is a light which glows from within and it is your choice to allow it into your life.

Sometimes it may be something or someone who brings us a feeling joy.  This is lovely and should be appreciated and experienced to the fullest.  Don’t deny yourself this pleasure just because it comes from an outside source.  It is still a blessing to be grateful for and to enjoy, even though it may be momentary.

But remember that TRUE happiness comes from within.

From an inner contentment.  From living in an attitude of gratitude and being thankful for all your blessings.

 From appreciating what you have AT the moment, IN the moment.

It is not something you search for and find if you are lucky.

True happiness is a state of BEING.  It is something you ARE.  Something you choose to BE.

Many people think that once they find happiness they will be grateful for it.  It is just the opposite.

If you are grateful, you are happy.  Simple as that!

Please check out this post for further insights:  https://notinindia2012.wordpress.com/2012/04/18/the-secret-of-happiness/

Love yourself enough to allow yourself to be happy!

with love light and JOY

Jane

Read Full Post »


“Getting lost in love” is truly not a healthy way to “be” in love-or to love someone.

freedom-being you

Since the ending of my relationship with Y  just 3 weeks ago I’ve had many ups and downs, mostly ups to be honest, some doubts but none of them serious, some thoughts about my own ability to be IN a relationship at all (not just THIS particular one, ANY one), and all those thoughts and doubts have also proven themselves to be unfounded and lacking any truth. (took some deep inner work to figure this out, lots of prayer, meditation and guidance,but it was well worth the effort).

To finally understand that freedom to be completely yourself is possible WITHIN a relationship when that relationship is with the right person.

My relationship with Y was an amazing roller coaster ride, in which I soared to the highest peaks and fell sickeningly to the lowest places possible (literally-with more health issues than I’ve experienced in all the past 20 years put together)!  But I was tossed into this relationship unexpectedly and by surprise,  by God and the Universe, once again in order to learn more about myself and my being with a partner.  The school of life literally never ends, but some courses are easier and some are much more difficult to get through.

Y was a loving and caring teacher and he succeeded in teaching me more than anyone has in the past – including my parents, my friends, even my children.  I will always remember him with deep love for this role he played in my life.  But the biggest lesson, and one which has been plaguing me my whole life, was something I still had to learn on my own, and it wasn’t until the relationship was ended, that the AHA! Moment came.

Actually, my soul understood the problem almost from the beginning of the relationship 1 1/2 years ago, but I refused to listen!  (As we very often do).  And when I DID begin listening, and tried to blend with my soul’s understandings of what was “right” for me, this became the catalyst , or CAUSE of the relationship finally coming to an end.  But I did not see this until just a few days ago!  🙂

I once again realized that I had fallen back into my old habits of behavior while in a relationship.  I was still unable to be  WITH someone else and still be with myself as well.  I again found myself “loosing myself-getting lost-denying my own essence” in the process of being together with another. I found myself, for many reasons, going with the flow (the partner’s flow to be more precise) but in almost no way was this flow good for me.

And I actually thought I was enjoying the ride!!

In the first instance, a lifetime ago it seems, I had strong reasons to continue “going with the flow”…a large and growing family to take care of, long time friendship and loving times with my husband, a life style which was comfortable, pleasant and comforting, etc., etc.

Over 20 years later, ( and after many similar situations) I still found good reasons for “going with the flow” : a deep, soul wrenching, almost paralyzing love which could not be denied and was a great joy, blessing and privilege to have experienced, especially at my advanced age and after waiting so many years to find.

But it was still not a good enough reason to loose myself.

“Getting lost in love” is truly not a healthy way to “be” in love-or to love someone.

It is self destructive and self-sabotaging in the end and no relationship can be healthily sustained with this type of loving.

Only when it came to a point of exploding, or “imploding” on me, did I begin the process of trying to “retrieve” myself.  But this is so unfair to the other person.  They only know you as you presented yourself to them and they have no way of knowing how much you are denying your own needs and desires in order to be with them.  And when they DO find out that you need to be someone other than they thought you were, they very well may be unable, or unwilling to make the effort needed to “go with YOUR flow”.

Leaving his own comfort zone any further to continue to be with me, was something which Y was either incapable of doing, or simply unwilling to do to stay with me.  His own words were “The car is not worth the price!!”

So, the trick is to learn to be ME always, not to loose the essence of who I am no matter how much I love another and want to be with him. Not to accommodate my needs to fit the other person’s comfort zone without having him do the same for me.  If he is not able to be with me as I truly am, or not strong enough to be with me as I truly am, then we are not meant to be together.

When the person comes along who is secure enough in his OWN being to be with me, and to be worthy of me as I truly am, we will be able to live happily ever after.  And I believe it will still happen.

I am worth the effort needed by another to go with “my” flow as well.  To leave his own comfort zone as much as I need to leave mine.

And to find together a new place which is OUR comfort zone.

I believe this is possible.

I have Faith that this will happen and the memories of the deep soul love I felt with Y will always be with me.  Knowing that such love is possible between two people was one of the great blessings of this relationship. Finding this powerful love with the right person for me, is the next part of the journey, and I know things are already in place to manifest this new joyful miracle.

with love light and JOY

Jane

Read Full Post »


The More You Give the More You Get!

The Casino

The Casino

I have written in the past, both on this blog and on my Mindfulness Journal, about Manifesting Dreams and Creating a New Reality.  Much of what we talk about, and read about these days deals with the Laws of Attraction and attracting what we want into our lives. There are some very basic techniques about how to go about doing this. You can find innumerable posts, articles, videos, books, lectures, workshops etc. regarding this whole “business”.

But one thing which is very often overlooked, or not given enough attention, is the simple idea that “like attracts like” – meaning, if you live in a mode of want, if you worry about what you don’t have, and worry about what you do have but might not have tomorrow….if you count your pennies because you are afraid you may not have enough tomorrow, if you live “frugally” to insure your having enough “when”….then you are actually defeating the purpose. The more you live in fear of not having, the more you save for a rainy day, the more you count each penny you spend, the more you are “careful” with what you have,  the more you will attract more of the same into your life.  You will always be afraid and probably for the reason that you don’t have enough, you will never have enough for a rainy day, you will continue counting pennies because you will never have more than pennies to count, and you will never have “more”, rather you will continue to have ‘less”.

The story below is an example of how giving freely, even if you don’t have “enough”, of giving lovingly and without fear of “not having” what you need if you’ve given to someone else, of sharing what you have with a full heart, attracts even more into your life.  People who live like this, even if it seems as if they have very little, will ALWAYS have what they need, whenever they need it.  I can tell you this from personal experience as well.  Once I got out of the “fear” mode and moved into the “free” mode, once I began giving lovingly, to others and myself, whenever I felt like it or needed to, I began experiencing all kinds of unexpected surprises of money finding its way into my life, free vacations coming my way, strange “coincidences” and of course no longer having to worry that I don’t have, or will not have, enough.

I recently posted the following on my Facebook page:

On my way to the train station and in the blink of an eye my travel plans have changed. As always, God and the Universe are looking out for me, and I have been sent an Amtrak ticket by an angel named M. so that I don’t have to travel by local commuter train where I would save $60 or more but would have to change trains, (I am carrying all my luggage) ,wait for trains and spend more than 2 hours riding what is less than a 1 hour actual trip. I am truly blessed! 😀

The angel was my cousin who I was going to visit and she lovingly paid for my Amtrak ticket, round trip, and did so with joy and happiness.  Two days ago, she took me “just for fun” to a casino near her home.  I just played out the $5 I was given as an incentive by the casino, and when I finished, she took over the machine I was playing,  After a couple of minutes of play, SHE WON $1000!!!!.  And that is how it works!

The Winnings

The Winnings

Give Lovingly and Joyfully to Yourself and Others!

Be Happy About  the Money You Spend, on yourself and others!

Believe that You Are Deserving of an Abundant Life

THE MORE YOU GIVE THE MORE YOU GET!

with love light and JOY

Jane

Read Full Post »


I have not posted regularly  lately and ask for your understanding.  I’ve been on a carousel ride for the  past 10 months or so, and the ride is finally slowing down enough to allow me to jump off for awhile.

LONE LEAF

I had arranged a trip to the States months ago, to visit my family, and the timing could not be more perfect.  I am leaving for 3 weeks, and have no idea if I will be posting here, or not.

SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED TO BE ALONE

I even two blogger awards which I have not even gotten around to and extend my thanks to Heart Whispers
for nominating me for the wonderful 7×7 Award and to  TheBurntMap for the Kreativ Blogger nomination.  I am truly overwhelmed by these nominations and do promise to properly accept them as soon as I get back “on track”.

I am not disappearing forever, but the need to “be away” from all the current demands of my reality is very powerful, and will respect my soul’s wishes to stop the world and get off for awhile.  I’ve learned that truly listening to these inner messages, these soul needs, is essential to my good health on all levels.  When we move away from this “listening”, we find ourselves floundering in cold, choppy waters, looking for a log to grab onto to bring us back to shore.

I have found my log and am now hanging on for dear life.

I will treat myself with compassion, love and respect.

STREET FLOWERS TO BLESS AND CALM MY DAY

I am allowing myself to enjoy this period of rest and relaxation (or recuperation) to the fullest, without feeling guilty about it in any way, and with full compassion for my soul’s needs.

Will see you all when I find the need to be back here.

with love light and JOY

Read Full Post »


Let Go and Let God

Beautiful Things to See Everywhere if we are Just MINDFUL of them

One of the things I have been manifesting for years now, is a brand new car (red of course!) There have been many things on my wish list, and so far, without exception, each thing has found its way into my life in strange and surprising ways, once I was able to release my own need to control the way things were happening- when and how  I felt, or imagined they should happen.  Since we do not have access to the “overview”  (for more information regarding this concept, you might like to check out the Kryon website and channelings, or read the books), there is no way that we can ever imagine, with our human limitations, the truly amazing things the Universe holds in store for us.  By trying to determine the “hows” however, we limit the Universe.  I have learned over the years to form a crystal clear intention of what I desire, hold it in my mind, feel its emotional reality and behave as if I already have it.  Once I have done this, I completely release everything else to God and the Universe and have o that all will happen exactly when and how it is meant to for my Higher Good.  Let Go and Let God

Free Food for the Pigeons

Once this became my modus operandi, things began finding their way to me, much to my continued amazement.  After years of  “doing everything the right way” to find a life partner for example, and always winding up with the wrong person, I realized that my trying to decide what I needed, what was best for me, was simply illogical and counter productive.  Once I got to the place in my life where I truly loved and respected and valued myself for who and what I am, I simply asked that whatever, and whoever was best for me, be allowed to find his way to me…and worked on this from a deep soul level. It has now been 9 fabulous months since this wonderful man was sent my way.  We met under very unusual circumstances, in a place I would never consider meeting someone, and he looks and acts (outwardly) nothing like I would have ever imagined myself to want.  But when we were brought together, we both knew that “something was happening”, and it is clearly a match made in heaven, and one that could never have happened by “doing all the right things” and taking charge of my life. We both agree that we are living a miracle and are grateful for it each and every day.

Free Food

The second thing which seemed as if it would never happen (simply because I did not have enough money), was my getting my own brand new, red car.  Well, applying the same intention and release system, things have once again proven themselves to truly work.   A large sum of money came into my possession in a totally ridiculous and unimaginable way, and I was truly flabbergasted by this.  I began to think about it, meditated on it, and realized this was God’s answer to my focused intention on a car.

So today, I went into town to find out about financing the rest of the car in the best possible way.  On the way, an Angel Feather was waiting for me…but not the usual kind.  Mostly I get the tiny fluffy ones or large ones which are shiny and beautiful.  This one looked as if it had been trampled and it had grease on it, and I almost went past it.  But if it was directly in my path, it HAD to be a message for me.

Angel Feather

Once I picked it up and felt its energy, I knew it was confirming my decision to buy a new car, but also telling me that things might not run as smoothly as I imagined but that I had made the right decision and all things would work out in the end.

And that is precisely what happened the rest of this day.  I won’t bore you with details, but I will be getting my new car, it will be what I have been dreaming of, but it will not be quite a simple as it seemed a few days ago.  But just knowing the Angels are supporting me will get me through the difficult places and keep me from giving up on the idea if it seems to ambitious.

While out and about, checking out the banks, I was, as usual, walking mindfully and enjoying the lovely spring weather -particularly the sunshine after so much cold and rain of late.

While waiting for my bus,  I came across this group of pigeons also enjoying not only the spring weather, but a free meal.  Lazily moving around and relaxingly enjoying the free bread put out for them,

Pigeons Enjoying a Spring Day

when all of a sudden a crow came along (see if you can spot it in the photo) and disturbed the peace of the morning…you can see the pigeons beginning to take flight.

A Crow Disturbs the Peace

In short, a day which could have been just a dull and boring one, bussing into town, sitting in a bank to get information and then coming home with more things to worry about, turned out to be a beautiful Spring outing with interesting events to see along the way.

I am so truly blessed and am grateful each and every moment for all the wonder and joy God  the Universe, and the wonderful Angels who assist at all times,  bring into my life.

with love light and JOY

Read Full Post »


Sing Your Own Song

CHOOSING JOY-OR "SING JOY"

While practicing my yoga this morning, I was focusing on the photo above as I did my Tree Pose. It is one of my favorite signs (I have many on the wall facing my yoga mat and at different times, different ones draw my attention – usually bringing me messages appropriate to the particular day, or period in my life as needed.
While focusing all my attention on the “JOY” photo – what I kept seeing was not “choosing joy” but “SING JOY

Look more closely and you will understand what popped out at me.

I love to sing (although those around me truly suffer when I do it since I cannot carry a tune for the life of me !). I usually try to sing when no one is around, or when I still had a car, did most of my really loud singing while driving. I DO sing however when others are around sometimes, particularly when I dance folkdancing and people DO tend to give me dirty looks. But that is their problem I figure.

We all have our own song, our own style, our own personalities, our own way of doing things. We all “sing to the song of a different drummer” in one way or another. What is important, is to find our own song, to sing it joyfully, to rejoice in it, and to sing it often. Be who you are. Do what brings you JOY. Rejoice in your own specialness. And don’t let anyone make you feel uncomfortable about your way of doing things, of perceiving things, of responding to things, of

singing your own song.

with love light and JOY
Jane

Read Full Post »


Below is a mail I received from Tom, Don Thomas, a Shaman, and it was so perfectly said, that I felt I would share it with you all as he wrote it.  I have his permission and suggest you check out his website at the end of the post

My Dear Sisters and Brothers,

 I have found that low self-esteem and lack of self-love are issues often found together. If you suffer from low self-esteem, it is possible that the root cause is due to insufficient self-love.

 If you find it difficult to obtain unconditional love and acceptance for yourself or loving yourself feels unnatural, is it likely that your mind has been embedded with self sabotaging thoughts a long time.

 Nothing will be any different until you make a conscious decision to change and you have that power to change!  When you do not unconditionally love and accept yourself, you are basically telling the Universe that you are unworthy or undeserving of any love, acceptance or positive outcomes that have the same vibrational match as unconditional love and acceptance.   

Learning to unconditionally love and accept yourself starts with making a conscious decision with an intention to become happy and lead a fulfilled life. When you do not unconditionally love and accept yourself and suffer from low self-esteem, it is almost impossible to ever reach the potential that you suspect you have.

 When you make a decision to unconditionally love and accept yourself, you are really saying that you want to come alive. You accept that you are responsible for the outcomes that you experience in your life and would like yourself to shine from living a fulfilling life.

  I have compiled a list of suggestions on “How to unconditionally love and accept yourself”, therefore, if you’ve decided to unconditionally love and accept yourself here are my 18 suggestions which I believe can be helpful in fulfilling your decision:

 1. Fall in love with yourself. Think about what makes you you. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you are and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect. This does not mean that you do not learn to change from your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself despite your “flaws”. Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is You. Speak loving thoughts to yourself and believe in you by nurturing this self love with corresponding thoughts, words and deeds.

 2. Eliminate Self Criticism. Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest things? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good because you are stupid or make mistakes? If you find that you criticize yourself often, make an effort to stop the self-criticism. Remember I can is 100 times more important than IQ.

 3. Be Kind And Positive. When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself naturally grows. Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday when you talk to yourself and in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you then naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.

 4. Acknowledge Your Effort. It is not always about winning or being on top in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that you have done your best, even if you have not produced tangible results and learn from your efforts.  

 5. Let Go Of Worry. Unconditionally loving and accepting yourself requires you to let go of your worry. Constant worrying is a horrible way to live a life for it is wasted energy.  Worry does not help any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Only wise actions can! So instead of worrying, spend time thinking about what you can do to help the situation. If there is something you need to do then do it.  If the situation is beyond your control, then make a request to the Great Spirit for what you want. Next, surrender your outcome.

 6. Trust Yourself. Have confidence in your abilities. Know that you have the ability to make important changes for yourself as long as you put your heart in it. You can also support yourself by visualizing desired outcomes.

 7. Forgive Yourself. If you have made mistakes in the past that have caused you to feel less worthy, then you need to forgive yourself. All of us make mistakes; so there really is no need to beat yourself up over them. Also, if you have been carrying around baggage of emotional hurt because of a childhood trauma, learn to forgive yourself and anyone else who may have caused your pain.  

 8. Be Truthful To Yourself. Unconditionally loving and accepting yourself requires you to be truthful about your own feelings. If you are happy, acknowledge the joy. If you are sad, acknowledge the sorrow. When you are truthful about your feelings, you do not try to lie to yourself or seek to bury your negative emotions. Instead, acknowledging what you feel provides a good guide to what your thoughts are. As we all know, thoughts can be changed, so that healing and self growth can take place.

 9. Grow Spiritually. When you spend time growing spiritually, unconditional love and acceptance of yourself becomes automatic. You become more peaceful, connected, kind, loving and compassionate. You nurture a mind that grows more beautiful by the day. You naturally love yourself in the process.

 10. Make Positive Affirmations Everyday. Reframe your mental outlook with positive affirmations. For instance, say this to yourself “I love and accept myself completely and unconditionally.” Read your affirmations out loud several times a day and then incorporate them into actions that are unconditionally loving and accepting.

 11. Express Gratitude. Express gratitude for the person that you are. For instance, cultivate an appreciation for your strengths and gifts. Also, feel a sense of gratitude that you are alive and well, and fully capable of making a difference in your life. Look for what is right and see all the many blessings in your life which are overlooked or minimized when we only focus on what we don’t have.

  12. Nurture Your Dreams. Why deny yourself your dreams? When you nurture your dreams, you will love the life that you are leading. Every moment that you live is a joy because you are expressing yourself fully. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do rather than the things you did do.

 13. Boost Your Self Confidence. Make a deliberate attempt to look for opportunities that can help improve your confidence. For instance, if you are particularly good at doing something, set aside more time to indulge and improve your skills on it. Knowing that you have particular gifts and acknowledging them can boost  self-esteem.

 14. Relax. Give yourself space to take breaks every now and then. If you spend your time working, without paying attention to your health, it also means that you do not unconditionally love and accept yourself well enough to take care of your own body. Fill your time with silence, meditations, fun, joy, soothing music and visions of beauty; anything that nourishes your body, mind and spirit.

 15. Have Fun. Inject some fun into your life. Life is meant to be enjoyed. Do not take life or yourself too seriously. If you can think of life in this manner, you automatically relax and quit worrying over things that do not matter.

 16. Look After Your Body. It is important that you strengthen yourself with prayer, proper nutrition and regular exercise. Your body is a temple and you should treat it with respect, love and care. It has been found that the lack of self love is often the root causes of conditions like eating disorders, obesity or even terminal diseases.

 17. Learn To See Beauty. When you learn to see beauty in everything, you will also see beauty in yourself. Thus, stop and smell the flowers. Notice everything. Feel everything. The pink blush of the flowers in your garden, the greenness of the leaves, , the whisper of the gentle wind, or the myriad hues of a setting sun.

 18. Share the Love. Once you have a true feeling for unconditional love and accept of yourself share it with everyone you meet.

 I suggest reflecting on this affirmation to grow your self love: 

 I am me. In the entire world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it.  I own everything about me: my body, my mind, my spirit, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, my failures and my mistakes.

 Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with myself.  In so doing, I can unconditionally love and accept myself  and be friendly with all my parts. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know – but as long as I am unconditionally loving and accepting of myself, I can courageously look for solutions to the puzzles and learn more about me to deepen my unconditional love and acceptance of myself.

 However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at any given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new to replace that which I  discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me.  I am me and I love and accept me….unconditionally!  

 Happy Valentine’s Day! 

 Peace, Love and Sacred Journey,
Don Thomas

 www.shamanic-path.com

Read Full Post »

%d bloggers like this: